Too School For Cool (Journal Entry)

One of my super powers is learning. I love learning new things that others may deem trivial. In my skole, I watch documentaries or read books;a vitophilia that brings me great pleasure. For a long time I would hide this pleasure to be like others so I could be accepted. I thought that if I fit in for a while others would loosen up and allow me to finally be myself,  but the more I made alterations to myself, the more others seemed to find fault in me.

bookwormIn retrospect, I chose to neglect my zeal of learning because I didn’t want to be viewed as a phony  who was trying to be a “white girl”. I wanted to stay true to my race and be “hood”, because that was what being black was all about. I risked and forfeited many great opportunities because I was trying to “keep it real” with everyone but myself.

It took me a while to realize that the things that make me weird distinguishes me from others, and that’s not a bad thing at all. There is nothing wrong with intelligence because intelligence does not discriminate between race  or religion; intelligence is available  to those that are in constant pursuit of knowledge.  In fact,  our greatest leaders sought after intelligence with a color blindness that allowed them to speak and  reach groups of people who were once biased and calloused towards minorities.

When we put limits on our education we limit our potential to reach others from diverse  walks of girl

I am no longer afraid to admit that I enjoy reading, writing, museums, and most importantly thinking. I enjoy being optimistic and accentuating the positive. I watch Jeopardy every night and guess what, both of my parents are B-L-A-C-K! I am grateful for all of the things that make me who I am. I may not live up to the standards of the hood and that is just fine, truth be told, I think that the standards of the hood should be raised a couple of notches any way.

Our race does not determine our intelligence, our willingness to learn does.


* Images found on



  1. My father bought my first set of book classics. Moby Dick, Last of the Mohicans, Robinsoe Crusoe and others. I was reading these by the time I was five years old. My mom bought me H. M. S. Pinafore on vinyl and it came with a book that I could follow along with and I was about seven. I have always been viewed in a different light from my “homies”. Even today, a friend recently told me that I dress like a white person. At first I tried to figure out how to change the way I dress, but then I realized I dress the way I dress, period. I read the dictionary, great words in the dictionary, like weltschmerz, or how about the phrase “hoist by his own petard”. One more thing. when Jeopardy came on in my mom’s house, everybody knew not to disturb her. I like being well-rounded. So I feel you, gurl.

    1. I knew that I had a kindred spirit out there. I think the biggest part was being picked on or considered “white”. I know that I could never be another race, but when you are young you just want to be accepted. I think that ladies like us have been purposed to be the interpreters of our culture and we must be able to articulate the matters at hand to all that are willing to listen and learn. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts. I hope that you have a great day. And, I might want to raid your closet 🙂

      1. Hahaha, yea you could raid my closet. And learn how to dance, people used to tell me that I danced like the white kids on the Dick Clark Show! I loved the Dick Clark Show. You have a good day, also.

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